April 22nd, 2013
I feel so empty and gone
my life changing from vivid hues to
graying ash and backlash
All I know is bottomless depths of
uselessness and
I miss those broken parallels
Parallels that have faded from visibility
They were my enemies
but at least they were constant
And you hold my broken sand-hand
trying to keep me afloat in a sea of broken mirrors
that reflect the shattered being I am
Strong is all I've known
but now strength fades from me like leaves lifting away from an autumn tree
Those glass gashes and slits show some creature I don't know
She looks at me
red cheeks and velveteen eyes
things I could never posses
and her scars match mine
they are so alike and yet she is so much more than I could ever be
Her scars fade and she seems not to care
while mine turn to whispers and I cry for them to come back
for they release all this hurt and insecurity
until they become just another whisper that slips in
at night by way of that flowing willow tree
It's just a whisper that seems to scream and pick at my seams
until the old scars are new goodbyes
but how could I miss those demons that wanted me to die?
I just want that love that people seem to have for themselves
But then again
We're all hiding behind obscure masks that
fold our faces into the idea we have of perfection
I long to throw my mask away
but then these demons would show
and chase away those that with to remain
And I just want to sleep without those whispers
flowing in on spring's breezes
They hold me in their ghostly hands
until the nightmares just slip out
I wake and hide beneath the covers of my lies
until they all seem to fall apart
Tears are my companions at every turn
and I cry for no god damn reason
because I am a fucked up pile of human flesh
who sits and just can not stand goodbyes
even when they may save my life
I just want to love and for you to hold me through the night
because your arms are the only place I feel safe
until you have to leave and then I need
to stand on my own two feet
But I want to fall against you
for you chase the demons and ghouls away
Your arms are the holy water that keeps all monsters at bay
but your scars match mine
even though you are far more divine
You chased your demons away all alone
and mine linger and cloak me like shadows
yet no on sees how god damn scared I am
but you do
and all I ever seem capable of is
bringing you to this god-forsaken realm
and casting my hellions on you
like skin-splitting chains
I want you to save me from me
but you still need to save you from you
so until you do I wander these corners
and you follow me like an angel
even though I am no saint
But then again
neither of us is draped in holy robes
I owe you my life
but I have given you a crown woven in strife
while I push you down only to cry and beg forgiveness
You have my hear glued to your hand
and I know there is no other place for it anymore
because my chest is a hurricane of worthlessness
that threatens to engulf everything else
Even though your light trends to chase the darkness away
I feel myself crumbing
so baby
please
I need you to save me
I ask so much and you receive so little
but all I want is you and me
and long, loving nights
with stars draped in our hands
and galaxies swirling around our heads
No more whispers that carry strife
No more broken nightmares
I want you and me
blissfully asleep
instead of this painful awareness
Your hand in mine as we conquer the divine
and slip into another galaxy
trips to spilled milk Milky Way
and cold asphalt nights
Arm pressed against arm
knee against knee
until all we see
is the galaxy stretched before us
and ripped open canvases of
goodnight dreams
I feel so empty and gone
my life changing from vivid hues to
graying ash and backlash
All I know is bottomless depths of
uselessness and
I miss those broken parallels
Parallels that have faded from visibility
They were my enemies
but at least they were constant
And you hold my broken sand-hand
trying to keep me afloat in a sea of broken mirrors
that reflect the shattered being I am
Strong is all I've known
but now strength fades from me like leaves lifting away from an autumn tree
Those glass gashes and slits show some creature I don't know
She looks at me
red cheeks and velveteen eyes
things I could never posses
and her scars match mine
they are so alike and yet she is so much more than I could ever be
Her scars fade and she seems not to care
while mine turn to whispers and I cry for them to come back
for they release all this hurt and insecurity
until they become just another whisper that slips in
at night by way of that flowing willow tree
It's just a whisper that seems to scream and pick at my seams
until the old scars are new goodbyes
but how could I miss those demons that wanted me to die?
I just want that love that people seem to have for themselves
But then again
We're all hiding behind obscure masks that
fold our faces into the idea we have of perfection
I long to throw my mask away
but then these demons would show
and chase away those that with to remain
And I just want to sleep without those whispers
flowing in on spring's breezes
They hold me in their ghostly hands
until the nightmares just slip out
I wake and hide beneath the covers of my lies
until they all seem to fall apart
Tears are my companions at every turn
and I cry for no god damn reason
because I am a fucked up pile of human flesh
who sits and just can not stand goodbyes
even when they may save my life
I just want to love and for you to hold me through the night
because your arms are the only place I feel safe
until you have to leave and then I need
to stand on my own two feet
But I want to fall against you
for you chase the demons and ghouls away
Your arms are the holy water that keeps all monsters at bay
but your scars match mine
even though you are far more divine
You chased your demons away all alone
and mine linger and cloak me like shadows
yet no on sees how god damn scared I am
but you do
and all I ever seem capable of is
bringing you to this god-forsaken realm
and casting my hellions on you
like skin-splitting chains
I want you to save me from me
but you still need to save you from you
so until you do I wander these corners
and you follow me like an angel
even though I am no saint
But then again
neither of us is draped in holy robes
I owe you my life
but I have given you a crown woven in strife
while I push you down only to cry and beg forgiveness
You have my hear glued to your hand
and I know there is no other place for it anymore
because my chest is a hurricane of worthlessness
that threatens to engulf everything else
Even though your light trends to chase the darkness away
I feel myself crumbing
so baby
please
I need you to save me
I ask so much and you receive so little
but all I want is you and me
and long, loving nights
with stars draped in our hands
and galaxies swirling around our heads
No more whispers that carry strife
No more broken nightmares
I want you and me
blissfully asleep
instead of this painful awareness
Your hand in mine as we conquer the divine
and slip into another galaxy
trips to spilled milk Milky Way
and cold asphalt nights
Arm pressed against arm
knee against knee
until all we see
is the galaxy stretched before us
and ripped open canvases of
goodnight dreams